It’s the Small Things…

Well, Helm’s Deep is out, and West Rohan is mine to wreck havoc on some baddies (who seem to have a distaste for fair trade, and rather fond of pillaging farms). Thus far, I’d say I’m maybe halfway through questing in this expansion, though not certain. While I was in the beta, I purposely only skimmed the outer slice of the region, merely to save the juicy inside for a fresh playthrough, come Live.

Based on the title, I know where I’m heading, likely. I know I’ll have to bundle up in my big boy leathers, double knot my boot laces, and make sure my bow string makes just the right thwipppp to assist in slowing down the advancing troops. I even jumped ahead a bit, and played a couple of solo big/epic battles. While I don’t have a strong strategic grasp on my duties in these things, I look forward to hopefully experiencing them a bit more (and perhaps some group play, which seems evident to me as the intended structuring).

Until then, there’s plenty to see and hear. While some of these Rohirrim may be flailing their arms about, waiting for a hero to arrive and save them from the menial task of schlepping wood piles, others actually realize they can’t just laze around. There’s that feeling of activity and movement in the zone (it’s aliiiiive), and with that come some nice semi-hidden morsels. While they may not be important toward advancing the strife of the Westemnet, they’re just those little things you can stop and enjoy along your path.

The following tidbits, while not (hopefully!) spoiling any storylines in the expansion, may spoil your own adventurous discoveries. Proceed with caution, and feel free to hold off reading until you complete the region!

 

Goldilocks: She’s gunna be in Helm’s DEEP trouble!

This is one of those discoveries that does a nice job at painting the scene together. Included below is a stack of shots that do a basic job of introducing you to the popular tale. Upon reaching the location (located south of Beaconwatch, coordinates approximately ~72.2S, 58.5W), you’ll come across a small cabin in the woods. In front are three docile bears, seemingly a family. Approach the house, and a lawn depiction of a fairy tale-like creature welcomes you in!

Entering the home continues the story. I apologize for not getting a great panoramic shot of the interior, but I didn’t look closely enough at some things to realize their importance in verifying the scene until after revisiting the area. However, should you decide to visit this tale yourself, I would recommend keeping an eye on the size of the interior decorations. Once I realized this myself, I not only smacked my head, but was glad this seemed to legitimize my initial thoughts.

 

You’d be NUTS to miss this gathering!

While this may or may not be a vague nod toward Beatrix Potter’s The Tale of Squirrel Nutkin, this is just one of those fun little scenes to come across. From Aldburg, head east to roughly 68.9S, 61.4W, and you’ll discover a couple of now-forgotten shack, occupied by a sizable population red squirrels. Alas, I didn’t spot an owl in the scene (though there’s a lot that could be hidden in a forest like this).

 

Imitation is flattery, even to a corrupted wizard

The following dialogue is not connected to a tale, but rather to a well-known LOTRO meme that arose from a certain instance in Dunland (during the Rise of Isengard expansion). Head on over to the Auction Hall in Aldburg, and wait for one of their live auctions to begin. Below is a transcript of that auction, for your reading pleasure.

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Curator says, ‘”Excuse me, Gentleman.”‘
Curator says, ‘”The Auction shall begin shortly.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”I am sorry that I am late, did I miss anything?”‘
Curator says, ‘”The auction will now begin for this authentic rider figurine. TBD background on the item.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We will start the bidding at one gold piece. Do I hear one gold piece?”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”One gold.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We have a current bid of one gold, I repeat one gold.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”One gold, five hundred silver.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We have a current bid of one gold, five hundred silver. I repeat one gold, five hundred silver.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Right here, one gold seven hundred and fifty silver.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We have a current bid of one gold, seven hundred and fifty silver. I repeat one gold, seven hundred and fifty silver.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Two gold!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We have a current bid of two gold pieces. Do I hear two gold, five hundred silver?”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Over here!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”My lady, I have you bidding two gold, five hundred silver pieces, is that correct?”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Aye.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Very well, my lady. We have a confirmed bid of two gold, five hundred silver pieces. I am looking for three gold pieces.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Again, looking for three gold pieces. Do I see anyone for three gold pieces?”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”I have two gold, five hundred silver going once.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Three gold. I bid three gold.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Gah! Too rich for my blood.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We have a current bid of three gold pieces.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Three gold, five-hundred!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”That is three gold, five-hundred silver to the young lady over there. I repeat three gold, five hundred silver. Do I hear four gold?”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”This auction is all mine. Trust me, I am assured of it!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Four gold? Do I hear four gold?”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”I BID FIVE!”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”That is beyond me.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Five gold! We have a bid from the esquire in the third row. I repeat, the current bid is five gold pieces.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Six gold, five-hundred silver.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Very good! We have six gold, five hundred silver pieces as the current bid for this beautiful figurine.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Again, five gold pieces!”
Auctioneer says, ‘”I’m sorry sir? The current bid is at six gold, five hundred silver pieces. You will have to bid higher I’m afraid.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Seven gold!”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Nonsense! Again I bid five!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Sir! If you continue to shout out five I will be forced to have the guards escort you out.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Now, I have a current bid of seven gold. I repeat seven gold. Do I hear eight?”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”We are at seven gold. Again, do I hear a bid for eight?”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Seven gold is the current bid, going once!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Seven gold bid on this figurine, going twice!”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”Seven gold to be the final bid price for this figurine …”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”SOLD! Auction sold for seven gold to the gentleman in the second row.”‘
Auctioneer says, ‘”That will conclude our current auction for the hour. Please head over to Vault-Keeper to complete your purchase. Thank you!”‘
Curator says, ‘”The figurine sold for seven gold to the gentleman in the second row.”‘
Townsperson says, ‘”Hmph! I could have sworn I heard about that working at auction. Oh well.”‘
Curator says, ‘”Excuse me, Gentleman.”‘
Vault-keeper says, ‘”Congratulations on your success at auction. Please head through the door on your right.”‘

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I’m sure there are more little things hidden in the landscape, waiting for those to discover and enjoy. Whether they be depicted scenes (possibly more known tales on display?), or just interesting one-liners thrusted in dialogue, there is plenty to be found out there.

Have you found any cool hidden “easter egg”-type things in West Rohan, or perhaps even just anywhere in Middle Earth? Feel free to share below!

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.”

-John Hughes, via Ferris, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off